|Life is wonderful. |
(source of picture unknown)
I use to be in the "work long days-work my day off-work at home" state of mind when I was in retail as a store manager. I loved my work. I lived, ate, and slept my job. When it was time to redo the floorset, I could lay in bed at night and clearly picture every rack and every cabinet and every wall of my store. I knew what clothing was on each rack and every section of each wall, in my mind. I would rearrange the layout in my head while I headed to sleep. I knew exactly what was in my back stock room. I kept a legal pad of paper beside my bed to jot down my ideas through the night. It was my life, my world and it was ok...in my mind. I was what I perceived as happy.
But, it wasn't ok. I know that now. I lived in 5 towns/cities in 3 states in 10 years and the only people I knew were the people I worked with. We were friends in the store, but never went out anywhere. I didn't make time to meet new people. I never visited all the wonderful sights in the new towns I moved to. I didn't take the opportunity to experience the great music/theater/entertainment culture that was offered in Charlotte, St Louis, Wilmington. I passed on Blues Festivals, Folk Festivals, concerts of musicians I loved, Renaissance Fairs, County Fairs. By the time my day was done, I was pretty tired. By the time a day off came, if I took it, I needed to do laundry, groceries, and sleep. Although many of my days off were doing paperwork for the store. It was nice and quiet at home and I could think better. I couldn't even tell you what were good restaurants in my town/city, because I hadn't ventured out.
Most of you will know the outcome of a life like that. Yup, I burned myself out. What made things a little harder was as I felt the burn out, an emotional tragic event shocked my world as well. When the dust settled a little and I could see clearly again, I found that I could really "see". Life was too short to spend it like I was. That was when I jumped off the cliff and quit my secure decent paying job and started Simply Rebecca Studios. But, this time I know there has to be balance in my life. I need to enjoy the life that is around me. I need to explore. I need to meet new people, soaking up their energy. I need to take time for rest and quiet. I need to dream again. And I need to be ok with feeling emotion.
I am happy with letting the business evolve at a steady pace, each step moving forward. Stress is a killer and I don't want to live that life again. It gets you nowhere and offers you nothing in return. But, I must also know that the pendulum can swing the other way. I can become lazy and not reach far enough. And it has happened; I have had to have a nice talk with myself and reign myself back in. Balance...that is the key. It isn't easy to find that balance and it won't always be there. The great thing is that I know it now. I know that life is wonderful if you remember to live it.